Friday, April 24, 2009

Stimulus Package

Stimulus Payment Information.

“This year, taxpayers will receive an Economic Stimulus Payment. This is a very exciting new
program that I will explain using the Q and A format:

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgin.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set or some such
thing, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn’t that stimulating the economy of China ?
A. Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the Australian economy by spending your
stimulus cheque wisely:

If you spend that money at Kmart, all the money will go to China .
If you spend it on petrol it will go to the Arabs.
If you purchase a computer it will go to India .
If you buy a car it will go to Japan .
If you purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan .
And none of it will help the Australian economy.

We need to keep that money here in Australia. You can keep the money in Australia by spending
it at garage sales, going to a cricket match or footy game, or spend it on prostitutes, beer
and wine (domestic ONLY), or tattoos, since those are the only businesses that may still be
owned by Aussies.

Thank you all Australians,
Your mate,
K.RUDD.

Whitesnakes do it better.....errrr right!

2 comments:

Romeo Morningwood said...

It is amazing that these Economists spend a decade in Uni and this is all that they can come up with?

All of that bailout money should go back to the people not the banks and corporations..they are the idiots who drove our car over the cliff in the first place. Now we need to buy another car from them?

Keshi said...

How very true!


**Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.

LOL I said that to everyone ard me who was all gaga abt this so-called 'stimulus' package! No one believes me cos all they want is some quick n cheap cash to buy a trashy plasma TV!


Keshi.

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