With all the technology in the world today, being able to check up/spy on someone is a lot easier to do.
Both Karen and I have been victims of this kind of behaviour. I say victims for one simple reason and that is the intent. The intent was to catch us out in whatever the perpetrators mind thought was going on.
When I first met Karen I found myself wanting more and more to be around her even if it was five thousand miles distance between us. She made me feel happy; making me laugh and our humour was similar.
For my part the computer was an open book as I always felt I had nothing to hide that was until I was accused of things that I had typed. The questions then came thick and fast, I found myself continually having to defend my actions which only added to the problem.
If you have nothing to hide you have no need to defend yourself!
What a crock of droppings!
It was from that point on that I started to close things down yet the accusations continued. If I received a text I was expected to read it and share it. My whole life became stifled so I left.
Now my wife and our computers are open books, I have no fear of being accused of doing anything other than being me. We have a standard joke where I pretend to be reading her emails or looking over her shoulder. It is all in good fun, but the question remains, is it a form of abuse?
My belief is it is all about the intent. Why is a partner checking up on you? If you feel uncomfortable with this sort of behaviour then put a stop to it!
I know what is like to have whatever you do scrutinised to the 12th degree, having all that was written, all that you say twisted and turned against you. Even worse still those that you hold dear are no longer around due to the poison that they have been fed.
I see no reason to be checking up/spying on some ones personal life. If there is a lack of trust then it is time to move on before it is too late.
Author Steve Boddey